Marla is a visionary.  She is a “feel the fear and do it anyway” type of gal … in love, in work and in life.  Marla is not afraid to step out and pursue her dreams.
 
 Marla’s boyfriend, Tad, is a “be in the moment” kinda guy.  Tad likes going with the flow and seeing how things go.  He doesn’t plan for the future.  Maybe his dreams will come sooner or later.  Maybe not.
 
 Marla’s soul stirs for evolution.  Her goals are manifesting in all areas of her life.  She’s growing and changing at a rapid rate.  Tad remains the same.
 
 After 18 months of dating, Tad is content to continue living with his flatmates, as Marla sits waiting for Tad to make a move. 
 
 Marla loves Tad.  Her body lusts for his.  But with Marla on the move and Tad staying still, their relationship is moving in separate directions.
 
 Marla has two of the three “must haves” for her romantic relationship.  Unfortunately, two out of three isn’t enough.
 
 The three “L’s” every successful romantic relationship MUST have are:
 
 1.  LUST

 I believe the biggest non-negotiable for every romantic relationship is LUST.  If you don’t have chemistry with your partner, it’s just too hard.  Period.
 
 Chemistry shows up in two ways:  Eyes and ears.
 
 A masculine “Hero” sees what he likes, knows immediately what works for him and goes for it.
 
 A feminine “Ingenue” hears the deal.  An average looking man can get very cute to a feminine woman if she likes what he says.  A guy gets really, really cute when a woman has sex with him.
 
 (Marla still lusts for Tad because her body is sexually bonded to his … which is why she has stayed with him so long.)
 
 Ultimately, your body chooses your mate.
 
 2.  LIKE 

Does he make you laugh?  Forget that he thinks he has a sense of humor.  (The most boring person on the planet thinks he has a sense of humor.)  Does he have your kind of humor?  That’s what’s important.
 
Are you going in the same direction?  Do you want the same things from life?  Do you both want a family?  Or travel?  Or careers?  How do you spend your spare time?  These are important factors in romance.  Relationships take time and you want to spend time doing things you enjoy doing together.
 
Do you share common values?  Do you compliment each other?  Are you open to each others’ ideas?  You don’t have to have the exact same background or religion, but are your values in alignment?
 
Likability breeds compatibility.

  3.  LOVE 

 This may sound obvious since we’re supposed to love everyone on the planet.  When we think of romance, we naturally think of love.  But how is love demonstrated?
 
 Love is demonstrated through acceptance and communication.
 
It’s normal for couples to not have everything alike.  The differences keep it interesting.  You make like your partner, but you may not like everything about him.  The question is:  Can you accept him?
 
 Can you accept his differences?  Can you accept his imperfections?  Can you accept his little quirks and irritants?  And can you LIVE with them?  (That’s the real question.)  If you can’t accept your partner, you can’t live with him.  Period.
 
 How you communicate with your partner determines the level of intimacy in your romantic relationships.  It’s important not to go competitive in your dialogue.  Just like knowing your role in a relationship, it’s a good idea to know how to speak your part so you don’t step all over each others’ lines and end up fighting.
 
 Love is demonstrated through making and keeping agreements (as unromantic as that sounds.)  You can not be in a successful romantic relationship with someone who doesn’t do what they say they are going to do.
 
 Marla and Tad have love and lust.  What they lack is like.  The differences in their goals and lifestyles are incompatible.  As much as Marla loves Tad and her body lusts for his, they are unfortunately not headed in the same direction.  
 
Every successful romantic relationship must have three things: lust, like and love.  Does yours?